Random Thoughts from the wee hours of 11/29 Continued

It is now 5:06. still procrastinating. But you know what? I don't care because for the last twelve hours, I have not been wasting my time. In fact, I have been learning and exploring things that will better my life far more than a two page paper on Milosevic' trial.

I was just talking to Kevin (who is still studying for his psych exam on my bed) and I mentioned that a couple of days ago, I had an epiphany. I realized one of the main reasons I often go into depression. Granted, it isn't the ONLY reason but I think it is a major contributor. The reason is connected to why I believe I have not wasted any time by not doing my paper and reading various things and speaking to various intelligent people instead.

My mind constantly needs to be stimulated. So, reading about the Paleolithic Diet, philosophy, intelligent and amusing blogs, tennis stats, and a science article about why "talent" may not be as important as we previous thought stimulates me and interests me much much more than writing my awful paper. On Friday, I fell into a deep depression. Nothing was wrong... and yet I was sad and depressed and in despair. I realized that for the last three days I had been entertained and my mind had constantly been working and I had been excited about new things (living with Davio and Tex, buddhism, meditation, mind exploration, etc). On Friday, my thanksgiving break adventures ended and I returned to "normal" life and my mind was left with subpar stimulation. Thus, I was going to withdrawal from excitement and I craved more knowledge and new things. I am an adrenaline feign. What can I say.


Maybe I will work on this paper.

Probably not.

But I will watch the sunrise.

Oh crap, I have a GREAT philosophy class tomorrow on Abortion! It's at 11am.. That's a bit early considering it's 5:15 and I haven't written one word. Fuck, I don't even have an idea. Oh well. That class on abortion will definately excite me. The excitement may even possess me to sprint back to Brown Hall and re-injure my right foot again.


cheers.

-F